German is Funny

I did a presentation in January 2025 at Presentation Club in Berlin on German words I’ve collected over the years that I find funny. This came initially from a casual Twitter thread I started years ago to catalogue funny words as I learned them.

Taking a poo is called "doing big business."

Taking a poo is called "doing big business."

A whisk is called a "snow broom."

A whisk is called a "snow broom."

A cinnamon roll is called a "cinnamon snail."

A cinnamon roll is called a "cinnamon snail."

In some parts of Germany, potatoes are called "earth apples."

In some parts of Germany, potatoes are called "earth apples."

The word for lock and castle are the same.

The word for lock and castle are the same.

The word for bank and bench are the same.

The word for bank and bench are the same.

The word for prize and price are also the same. German is so precise, they say…

The word for prize and price are also the same. German is so precise, they say…

The word for dragon and kite, also the same.

The word for dragon and kite, also the same.

The time of the month when a woman is most likely to get pregnant is called "the egg jump."

The time of the month when a woman is most likely to get pregnant is called "the egg jump."

The word for ribcage is called the "breast basket."

The word for ribcage is called the "breast basket."

In german they took Santa Claus' name away, they just call him "The Christmas Man."

In german they took Santa Claus' name away, they just call him "The Christmas Man."

An armadillo is called a "belt animal."

An armadillo is called a "belt animal."

Headlights on a car are called "shine throwers."

Headlights on a car are called "shine throwers."

The word for poison is "gift" which can be confusing.

The word for poison is "gift" which can be confusing.

The word for tank and a crab's shell are the same. Kinda makes sense…

The word for tank and a crab's shell are the same. Kinda makes sense…

The word for the snack with nuts, raisins, and chocolate is called "student food" — but actually it's "feed" as in food for animals.

The word for the snack with nuts, raisins, and chocolate is called "student food" — but actually it's "feed" as in food for animals.

When a baby is toilet trained, the baby is simply referred to as being "clean."

When a baby is toilet trained, the baby is simply referred to as being "clean."

The word for animation is "sketching trick."

The word for animation is "sketching trick."

The word for adventure is almost literally "expensive evening."

The word for adventure is almost literally "expensive evening."

When Germans go hiking, they just call it "wandering."

When Germans go hiking, they just call it "wandering."

A sloth is just called a "lazy animal."

A sloth is just called a "lazy animal."

A lower back tattoo is called "ass antlers."

A lower back tattoo is called "ass antlers."

The word "zeug" means stuff, and they really use it for everything. Drive stuff = car, fire stuff = lighter, flight stuff = airplane, play stuff = toy, work stuff = tool.

The word "zeug" means stuff, and they really use it for everything. Drive stuff = car, fire stuff = lighter, flight stuff = airplane, play stuff = toy, work stuff = tool.